I wish you’d say something

Standard

I love the way I look today.
No you didn’t get in my way.
I’m not hungry at all.
I didn’t mean to call.
I’m exhausted and need my bed.
No I forgot what you said.
When will I stop lying?
When will I stop trying?
Stop trying to hide my feelings from you. Maybe because you’d hate me if you knew.
I actually hate the way I look today.
Not that you would even say.
Yes you in my way and I was mad.
But you don’t even notice if I’m sad.
I was starving but I chose to.
Staying skinny is hard to do.
But my body is what you look for.
Anything else from me is a bore.
Yes I meant to call you that day.
I was hoping you’d have something to say.
Maybe how was your day or hi.
But instead I chose to lie.
I wasn’t tired either that night.
I was trying to avoid a fight.
Because I have nothing Charming for you.
You annoy me with these things you do.
Saying I’m perfect and you’ll call me.
But unanswered text is all I see.
I’m fighting for attention day by day.
And I’m not sure you care either way.
So I lie so cover up my feelings for you.
Hoping they’ll just fade before you do.

 

Advertisements

Learn to Forget

Standard

Where do we learn to forget?
We spend our whole lives trying to remember things.
From kindergarten through college.
If you want to impress a girl you try to remember her favorite flower or color.
Parents try to remember what their kids want for Christmas or to let the dog out.
We remember people’s names, birthdays, the way their voice sounds or their laugh. We remember our favorite songs and memories with friends and family. We remember the smell of their cologne or perfume or the way their nose twitches when they lied. We remember grandmas secret recipe or what someone hates.
We remember anniversaries and kindness. But when do we learn to forget.
When someone leaves you how do you learn to forget the way she twirled her hair when she was thinking or the way he tapped his foot all the time. How do you forget to put that wedding ring on or make dinner for one not two. How do you learn to forget everything you spent a life time trying to remember. Because every time that song comes on, I think of you. Every time I see a daisy I think of you. And every time I see a god damn coffee shop, I think of you. And god damn it Iam trying so hard to forget. But maybe that’s it. Maybe I can’t forget because deep down…. way deep down, I don’t want to. Not yet.

Takes a Disaster to End a Disaster

Standard

It takes not one but two hurricanes to show we care?
It takes a natural disaster to make things fair?
Just last month we hated each other here.
People started to hide from each other in fear.
Rally’s against our president every where.
People are so petty the made memes about his hair.
America is not what it use to be.
This is not the free country I use to see.
Children don’t put their hand over their heart for our flag.
No their more worried about being bullied and called a fag.
Athletes take a knee to our nations anthem now.
And I ask you all, how did it become like this? How?
I hear talk about nazis and the Ku klux klan.
Still our nations president doesn’t have many fans.
But he is just one of many on this great land.
So why can’t we all just lend a helping hand?
Whether you’re black or white.
It’s time we stop this fight.
Whether your democrat or republican.
We can’t wait to be told when.
It’s time to make a change and stop this war.
This war between our people or more.
We are Americans and we should live free.
Free to be who we want to be.
I love my country and its people too.
But can someone tell me what to do.
Because it took a hurricane to bring light.
A hurricane to stop most the fights.
Our country is strong and great.
It’s time to love and trash the hate.

Distance

Standard

I don’t want to text you anymore.
I don’t even want to call you tonight.
I want to see you walk through my door.
I want you to hold me in your arms so tight.

I don’t wanna hear I’m beautiful or hot.
Don’t even try to FaceTime or snap me.
I want to know that you and I have a shot.
I want to know what you and I could be.

You know I envy the sun who sees you first.
The coffee mug that feels your lips too.
The pillows who dry your tears at your worst.
I wish I wish that’s what I could do.

I wish I knew the size of your hand against mine.
I wish I knew the sound of your feet walking my way.
Or the color of your eyes 2 inches from mine.
These are the thing I long for each day.

 

 

He thinks he’s slick

Standard

Babe am i the only one?
He says of course hun.
He gets mad and defensive real fast.
But you knew the answer before you even asked.
You one he hangs up the phone and swipes left and right.
You know he wasn’t helping his mama the other night.
You know that cologne is perfume and it ain’t yours.
But you don’t have a right to call them whores.
No because your man is making a choice for himself.
And he’s putting your feeling high on a shelf.
He looks like a good guy with you on his hip.
Baby girl I’m about to give you a tip.
If he can’t FaceTime you it’s sketchy already.
If he complains you can’t talk it’s petty.
He complains because he’s got another girl to please.
You’re cooking dinner alone and he’s got a girl waiting on her knees.
You’re all the hard work and beauty.
But the other girls are all boobs and booty.
He thinks he’s slick and he’s got it all.
Baby girl go make his kingdom fall.
Because you are the only one today.
The only one he’s playing this way.
Find your pride and walk on out.
There’s no need to fight and shout.
This man is a lie and he ain’t worth it.
Don’t you dare try to give him hope one bit.
You knew the answer the whole time my dear.
The truth wasn’t holding you back, but fear.
So let him play his game some more.
He won’t even realize you walked out the door.

Sleeping With Anxiety

Standard

Tonight I have no words to express.
My head is just a big mess.
So many thoughts I cants seem to share.
My minds racing like time square.
Anxious as a kid on Christmas Eve.
But I just want all these feelings to leave.
I can’t sleep tonight like this.
My sweet dreams I’m starting to miss.
Sick to my stomach the thoughts still spin.
I think tonight my anxiety might win.

I prayed for you

Standard

I can hear the sorrow in your tone.
I can hear the pain over the phone.
I wish there was something I could do.
Wish I could be there with you.
Tonight I got down on my knees and prayed.
I prayed that you wouldn’t be afraid.
Afraid to change and be who you’re meant to be.
Be the man that your mother sees you to be.
I prayed that you smile so bright.
That god can help you with this fight.
I asked him to give you strength too.
Strength to turn down all the boos.
I can hear the sorrow in the silence you bare.
And I know this life may not seem fair.
But keep your head up darling and fight.
For now I’ll pray for you at night.