It’s use to be the bottles and pills.
I would cringe for another re-fill.
It was dark and it was bad.
An addiction they said i had.
But then one day i met you.
At first i didn’t know what to do.
You became my new addiction.
It was an instant connection.
You chased the bottles away.
Trashed my pills everyday.
You were good for me.
But the past is all i could see.
Soon enough you tasted my buzz.
Started trying to guess who i was.
The past crept back to me fast.
Can’t remember when i was sober last.
You tried to put up a fight.
But hope was no where in sight.
I was slipping from your hold.
And my heart was growing cold.
Baby can you get my high.
I’m too scared to say goodbye.
Save me from this hell im in.
Don’t let the drugs and alcohol win.
I miss the high you once gave me.
Happy with you is all i wish to be.
But this past keeps coming back.
The strength to fight i seem to lack.
So I’ll take another hit and pray.
Pray you fight for me and stay.
I see a future with out you.
Your games were all i knew.
But now i won’t fall for it.
No i took too many hits.
What was i doing back there?
You never really did care.
I should of ran a long time ago.
My pain now is all you have to show.
But I’m long gone now baby.
I don’t need anyone to save me.
I can make it on my own.
Don’t bother calling my phone.
My future is about me now.
So take your games and take a bow.
Turn around and never come back.
A heart was something you always lacked.
I’m picking mine up off the ground.
Don’t you dare come back around.
I’m moving on and I’m gonna be happy.
Nothing but Love will surround me.
I’m done with your games boy.
I’m not you’re stupid little toy.
I am beautiful, smart, and better than you.
You don’t deserve me. I should of knew.
Depression does not discriminate.
It takes prisoners and brings the hate.
Tortures them day and night.
Never giving them a chance to fight.
It makes them feel broke inside.
All they want to do is hide.
Hide their fake smiles and let out a cry.
Punch a wall and maybe scream at the sky.
Depression does not care who you are.
If you are working, shopping or at a bar.
It does not care if you are having a great day.
It will just burn with everything you say.
Nothing will be right for you.
You’ll cry and won’t know what to do.
You’ll wake up with tear stains on your pillow.
Fake a smile for the day and no one will know.
It will turn the sunny days to shit.
You won’t have anything to hope for one bit.
You’ll drown in your thoughts alone.
Slowly turning your heart to stone.
Soon enough depression will win.
Eat your insides and cause you to sin.
Unless someone can notice the pain. Finally shed some light on this rain.
Depression takes all and does not care.
Someone step up and make this fight fair.
Show the prisoner they are okay.
And that depression is not aloud to stay.
It’s just one of those days
Where nothing seems to go your way.
It called for sun but there’s rain.
You wore white today and got a stain.
You seem to hit every red light.
Can anything go right?
It’s just one of those days.
So tired everything’s a haze.
The vending machine ate your last dollar.
Your coworkers being a bother.
Bugging you for man advice again today.
Yet you can’t seem to get a man anyway.
It’s just one of those days
The day you seem to burn your dinner.
Not feeling much like a winner.
Ripped a hole in your favorite jeans too.
What possibly could you do?
Maybe you should just go to bed.
Forget it all today and rest your head.
Because it’s just one of those days.
He asked if you were okay.
You struggle to find what to say.
Do you tell him your mom hates you?
That you cry yourself to sleep too.
Do you tell him you’re always sad?
That a choice is something you never had?
Because you were rapped the other night.
You’re faith in god is a continuous fight.
do you tell him you live paycheck to pay check?
that your anxiety and self-esteem is a wreck.
Do you tell him you don’t sleep at night because of the pills?
That you can barely even afford your re-fills.
Do you tell him you barely eat some days in a row?
You tell him you’re just tired and okay.
He won’t understand the truth anyway.
You can’t make everyone happy here.
You can’t get rid of all their fears.
You can’t make them admit their sins.
Understand that you won’t always win.
But you can smile for others each day.
And listen to what they may need to say.
You can accept their faults too.
Do for them what you want for you.
You can’t take back that F for your kid.
You can’t take back the bruise they hid.
You can’t smother the tears they shed.
You won’t always tuck them into bed.
But you can pray to the man above.
Remind them they are forever loved.
You can provide for them too.
Everything they have is because of you.
You won’t always have it all.
You won’t always stand tall.
But you can at least try.
Maybe shed a little lie.
Because no-one is perfect my dear.
But you only get one life here.
So do the best you can.
And then tell god when.
Suddenly i remember it all.
That very night and that call.
Suddenly i feel the pain too.
And you always knew.
You knew what you did to me.
I was just too drunk to see.
You convinced me i was drunk.
And all this truth sunk.
You told me i invited you.
But i know you knew.
You knew i was drugged that night.
You knew i couldn’t put up a fight.
You knew i liked you before.
So you dropped your pants to the floor.
The next morning it felt wrong.
I thought about it for so long.
You claimed you didn’t know.
Sympathy is all you could show.
But in the end you know what you did.
And i should of never had hid.
Because now i live with this.
My choice was surely missed.
I never had a say here.
And now I’ll live in fear.
Fear of every man i thought i knew.
Fear of what they could do.
You may not think you did it to me.
But your face and my pain is all i see.
You made me a victim that night.
Drugged with no chance to fight.
It’s your word against mine i guess.
Why’d you have to go and make a mess.