It’s just one of those days
Where nothing seems to go your way.
It called for sun but there’s rain.
You wore white today and got a stain.
You seem to hit every red light.
Can anything go right?
It’s just one of those days.
So tired everything’s a haze.
The vending machine ate your last dollar.
Your coworkers being a bother.
Bugging you for man advice again today.
Yet you can’t seem to get a man anyway.
It’s just one of those days
The day you seem to burn your dinner.
Not feeling much like a winner.
Ripped a hole in your favorite jeans too.
What possibly could you do?
Maybe you should just go to bed.
Forget it all today and rest your head.
Because it’s just one of those days.
He asked if you were okay.
You struggle to find what to say.
Do you tell him your mom hates you?
That you cry yourself to sleep too.
Do you tell him you’re always sad?
That a choice is something you never had?
Because you were rapped the other night.
You’re faith in god is a continuous fight.
do you tell him you live paycheck to pay check?
that your anxiety and self-esteem is a wreck.
Do you tell him you don’t sleep at night because of the pills?
That you can barely even afford your re-fills.
Do you tell him you barely eat some days in a row?
You tell him you’re just tired and okay.
He won’t understand the truth anyway.
You can’t make everyone happy here.
You can’t get rid of all their fears.
You can’t make them admit their sins.
Understand that you won’t always win.
But you can smile for others each day.
And listen to what they may need to say.
You can accept their faults too.
Do for them what you want for you.
You can’t take back that F for your kid.
You can’t take back the bruise they hid.
You can’t smother the tears they shed.
You won’t always tuck them into bed.
But you can pray to the man above.
Remind them they are forever loved.
You can provide for them too.
Everything they have is because of you.
You won’t always have it all.
You won’t always stand tall.
But you can at least try.
Maybe shed a little lie.
Because no-one is perfect my dear.
But you only get one life here.
So do the best you can.
And then tell god when.
Suddenly i remember it all.
That very night and that call.
Suddenly i feel the pain too.
And you always knew.
You knew what you did to me.
I was just too drunk to see.
You convinced me i was drunk.
And all this truth sunk.
You told me i invited you.
But i know you knew.
You knew i was drugged that night.
You knew i couldn’t put up a fight.
You knew i liked you before.
So you dropped your pants to the floor.
The next morning it felt wrong.
I thought about it for so long.
You claimed you didn’t know.
Sympathy is all you could show.
But in the end you know what you did.
And i should of never had hid.
Because now i live with this.
My choice was surely missed.
I never had a say here.
And now I’ll live in fear.
Fear of every man i thought i knew.
Fear of what they could do.
You may not think you did it to me.
But your face and my pain is all i see.
You made me a victim that night.
Drugged with no chance to fight.
It’s your word against mine i guess.
Why’d you have to go and make a mess.
You ever just cry.
Cry and not know why.
Maybe a few seconds they pour.
Or an hour they fall to the floor.
Ever just cry walking down the street.
Or maybe in class right in your seat.
You can’t handle the flow.
And you try not to let it show.
You sniffle saying your sick is all.
Yet you hide your face in the hall.
Ever just lose your shit.
Have a huge crying fit.
Because so have I.
But if you ask I’ll lie.
I’ll say I’m sick too.
There’s nothing you can do.
You won’t know I’m weak.
You won’t see my emotions leak.
sometimes I don’t take care of myself. I shove my feelings up on a shelf. I act like I’m okay. Pretend I have nothing to say. I worry about others first. But that just makes it worse. You get nothing for being the nice one. Tell me, Is it any fun? constantly giving your time out. Do you even have any doubt? Has anyone returned the favor? any sweet gesture to savor? I need to look in the mirror. The reflection I’m starting to fear her. I can’t recognize myself quite anymore. My pride is getting a little sore. Sometimes you don’t need to prove yourself to anyone. They all could care less of what you’ve done. Just focus on those who care. And your self to be fair.
Her little hands had no idea they’d have to put up a fist.
Her little feet had no idea they’d have to run.
Her little ears had no idea they’d hear goodbye.
Her little lips had no idea they’d have to say goodbye.
Her little eyes had no idea they’d have to shed these tears.
Her little heart had no idea it would break so easily.
this little girl had no idea growing up would hurt so much.